But God by Tina Johndrow

Lee & Tina during their ordination August 10th 1997
Lee & Tina during their ordination August 10th 1997

Many days when I sit down to type out what I send Lee, I begin the conversation with God like this: “I don’t have anything to say” Tina says. “But I do”. says God. This afternoon is no different. But what I do have is a phrase echoing in my head. That phrase is simply this….”But God”. In the New American Standard Version, there are 595 references to “But God”.

So many times I have wanted to give up in frustration and despair when things aren’t going the way I would like them to. But God. Last night Lee and I went for what we thought was going to be an hour long motorcycle ride. It ended up being 2 1/2 hours and ended on the chilly end of the day. I know Lee felt bad as he discovered he hadn’t brought his wallet and we were dangerously low on gas and had to call Matthew for assistance. He didn’t want to inconvenience him as Matthew and Alexis were having company over. But Lee didn’t want to risk the bike running out of gas while I was on it. He was concerned for me.  So where is the But God? In the growth of our marriage. Marriage is not easy sometimes. It requires maturity and sensitivity and lots of things that don’t always come easy. Many moons ago a prophet spoke in our presbytery that God would use Lee and I and the issues of our marriage to speak to hopeless cases. Probably because at one time both Lee and I thought our marriage was a hopeless case. But God.

It may not seem like much to you, but it means everything to me.

Acts 2:24 But God raised Him up again, putting an end to the agony of death, since it was impossible for Him to be held in its power.

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